Poems April 2017

Training

Car full of strangers
Where are we going?
Why, down the tracks
Easy answer
But we ride a metaphor
The steps across the gap
From platform to motion
Irrevocable now
And what follows
As inevitable as
Rosedale
Laurelton
Locust Manor
Jamaica
Woodside
Penn Station

April 30, 2017

Cargo

Old buddy
I'm melting like a cloud here
or like a dog toy or something
Look at this face in the mirror:
The face that sank a thousand ships!
This little sucky room
This garbage can with nightlight

Shoulda been reincarnated as a tiger
I got a tiger's heart

************

The moon has a cloud over it
and when it's full I can become anything I want:
The tiger
The leaper of mountains
The deer
The bird in the winds

April 28, 2017

The Party at Nolan's

The film out of focus
The camera miss-set
The director is desperate
The guests all upset:
"There's not enough finger food!"
While they empty the trays
The waitress is lost
But there's no script for the play
They're all trapped in it
Actors and audience both
Confused by the plot
It's the story of a ghost
That went on a trip
That turned out quite badly
Stuck on a train
With a horrible family
That spent all its money
To go visit Disney
Discovered the whole thing
Was bullshit and chintzy
Now the director and ghost
Are getting quite drunk
The waitress shipped herself home
In a trunk
The audience leaves
As they always do
And the actors send headshots
Because that's what they do

April 28, 2017

555-5555

The phone rings
It's night and
the phone rings
Pick up: hello?
There's breathing
like after someone has been crying
shuddering breaths
Or maybe
It's that wheezing breath that comes after a long hard laugh
A laugh that hurts
Check the number...
!?
It's my number!
Hello?! Hello??
Hello I say: is this a call from my future or my past? Is this a warning or a reminder?

There's no answer.
The breathing is quiet, but someone is still on the line
Pretending
Pretending they're not there!
I fall silent, too
And for a while we breath at each other
My heart does a weird gallop and suddenly
I know it is in sync with the heart on the other end

A thought blooms: this feels like...
Love
This
Feels
Like
Love
And I start to laugh - this is what love is I realize! This is love!
And I laugh for joy, my body aching from it
And then I hear a click

and I think:

they've hung up.

They've hung up? They've hung up! Hung up! And my heart does a strange gallop, as if it stumbled on a loose step and suddenly I know
I know

I know it beats alone

There is a catch in my throat. A blockage... a lump... a chunk of heart or a falling thought lodged there
Alone. Alone again. But now... I know it's forever
Forever
Doesn't something have to be something to be forever? Can nothing be forever?

This is loss
pure loss
A space made for something never to be there again, an alter - a box! An ark of a covenant but it's empty and hollow and the inside is missing and
Nothing is sacred
I start to cry! I'm crying!
Desperate! Desperately!
Cruel! Cruel!
I press buttons all over the phone
Please! Please! I must reconnect! Pick up! Pick up!
A click and a ring:

Hello?

April 27, 2017

4.27.17

a face
still
the surface of a pond
the twitch at the mouth's corner
a damselfly's touch
while you sip
your coffee
contemplative
lonely
blind to your own footprints that walked you here

April 27, 2017

Thought Balloon

Any morning you wake up alive is a hell of a lot better than a morning you wake up dead m'I'right?

It's a simple philosophy but I'm a simple guy
Too simple for the word
Philosophy
Such a big word, and for all the BS and Europeans
It basically says,
Here's what I think about some shit that can't really be thought about
but we can pretend

Here's a good one - try this try this:
Wake up somewhere half-way
Between dead and alive
And choose which
Way you're going to lean
for the rest of the day

Today I'm leaning towards dead
I don't even want fricken' flowers -
just walk by me like
like
like I'm a drab tombstone of
a drab couple that seem
to have done nothing other
than get born and die
and you never knew them

April 26, 2017

Less Like Fire, More Like Mold

My dear friend
It doesn't end the way you think
Romantic
Heroic
Battling the rising water
The sun leering down
Or a blast then a wind
then cliché images of rusty bikes and swings

It ends cold ass on a couch
Lipitor commercials and QVC
Re-reading picture history books
That just don't give any clues as to why no one visits anymore

April 26, 2017

4.25.17

Would that this was pop-able
But it's improbable
Because it's invisible
Like a grey never ending sky
With black trees cut out of it
It's a burn-out fabric
Found in a thrift store
Tom behind the counter
And a lilt to his accent - a lilt to everything he does
And you walking on the edge of something
And me holding your little hand, waterbear
Always invisible
Quite possible
So lovable

April 25, 2017

Fella

Hey Fella

Just a quick one
I'm sorry
You're forgiven

All those years ago, when you dropped that dish - that expensive heirloom plate
What grade were you in? Well, never mind. Doesn't matter. I digress.

Digress. Digressed all over the fucking place - Ha! The lost tribes of Israel had a GPS compared.

Whatever. It's about Kintsugi at this point, right? Like the waterbear.

Anyway - that's it for now.

April 24, 2017

Men Like Us

Men like us
Having a healthy breakfast
Healthy bacon
Laughing at that dick Billy Squire
Still pathetic since 1984
What's his net worth these days?

It's the Plantars Fasciitis that makes me so bitter
My soles hurt
So we don't walk much anymore
Men like us

Old men like us

April 23, 2017
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